I didn't know this day would affect me as it has. I have already passed so many milestones without him. His birthday, our anniversary, my birthday, Kellie and Joshua's birthdays. I have been looking ahead and worrying about the upcoming holidays. Trying to figure out what I should do to make it as easy as possible for the kids and I. I was looking so far ahead that I didn't see the pebble on my path that caused me to trip and skin my knee. As I sit here, cleaning my wound, I remember the man that I love. On this day that is set aside to remember those that have sacrificed so much for our freedoms, I think of the man that sacrificed so much for our family.
Ben was a lover of history. When we lived back east he was so excited to go and see all the Civil War battlegrounds. We went to Virginia and saw many things that were relevant to Thomas Jefferson, one of Ben's heroes. I remember him telling me the stories of these places, sharing with the kids and I the important things that had taken place at each location. He taught me so much. His love of history was contagious. The way he spoke about these things made even the most unwilling, (me), participant eager to learn. He had a way of bringing these "stories" to life.
Today I think of his history, of Ben's story. The stories his mother told me about him as a child, the man I fell in love with, the man I shared a life with. I think of all the things he taught me about myself, about the world, and about love. Today I miss him more than words can say. Today I miss MY hero.